“You Are Cordially Invited”

Would it have killed them to have brought back some of Worf's TNG buddies for his wedding?

They were too busy blowing their budget on the wedding dress and the Polynesian fire dancer.

Yeah, I could swear that at least Riker would qualify as one of Worf's "closest male friends," especially considering the TNG episodes "A Matter of Honor" and "Ethics," and Ronald D. Moore would have definitely been aware of this. I wonder if it was ever discussed but later vetoed for whatever reason.

That food that Miles and Julian were about to eat at Quark's looked awesome!

Well - as Jammer rightly stated: practically every "comical" wedding movie has basically the same plot twists as this episode. But I enjoyed the episode anyway - also because it was a welcome diversion from the war. Siskos log entry at the beginning of the episode was appealing for the same reason!

The ceremony itself was really well done and mythical with those drumbeats and the story of the Klingon Hearts.

And...yes, call me "juvenile" but I liked Jadzias Dress! ;o)

Yes, this is definitely a light-weight episode, perhaps an episode to recuperate from the last 6 episodes.

For such lightweight fare, almost everything works. The actors did well. The Kira-Odo scene could've worked, but they ran out of time, I guess.

It makes sense for the TNG characters not to appear. After all, Worf abruptly changed the time and place of the wedding, and it being war time and all...

About Jadzia's dress; the first time I went "hubba-hubba" at a Star Trek character.

Was I the only person who was... off-put by Martok's fascination with Sisko's baseball at the beginning of the episode? It just jumped out and hit me with a sledgehammer. :/

I was really impressed by the scene where Martok talks to Worf about being alone in his heart. I didn't find this dialogue hackneyed at all, and J.G. Hertzler has a tendency to steal scenes anyway, but really walked away with that one.

The singing was cool, too.

I never considered the TNG crew -- now that you come to mention it, it does seem odd they didn't make an appearance, but think about the logistical nightmare of having even a couple of Next Gen actors over.

Who would they bring over, cos no doubt Trek fans would be arguing about the validity of the choices for decades?

Who actually were Worf's closest friends? In my opinion, the TNG crew were nowhere near as well-developed as the characters in DS9, so picking a "best friend" would be anybody's guess.

Finally, the writers would actually have to write several characters from another show into a DS9 script and pay their wages. While this wouldn't bother me in the slightest -- I love Star Trek crossovers -- I can imagine it giving the DS9 creative team a bout of acid reflux.

"Who actually were Worf's closest friends? In my opinion, the TNG crew were nowhere near as well-developed as the characters in DS9, so picking a "best friend" would be anybody's guess."

I just hate it when people confuse TNG & Voyager like that.

You're right. I meant to say Voyager. Thanks Luke.

You could explain away the fact that no TNG cast were present by saying they logistically can't make it to DS9 due to the war/other assignement too far away.

Nobody has mentioned that the beat from the Klingon drummers in no way matched the beat on the soundtrack.

Meanwhile, perhaps all the TNG clue were drifting hopelessly in space after the last battle...

When, during the wedding ceremony, Worf's former wife refers to him as, "Worf, Son of Mogh...", isn't that incorrect? Isn't he now of the House of Martock(sp?) ?

There is an easier explanation for none of Worf's TNG friends being there for the wedding; it was quite suddenly moved up to allow Alexander (who would be leaving on a mission in a few days) to be present.

The wedding was never planned to take place that day and anyone not already on the station probably couldn't have made it there in time.

I have quite a few things to say about this episode. First, I was pleasantly surprised that they still mentioned that the war was going on in this episode. It's a nice touch that gives the show a more serialized feel.

Second, to answer the comments about the TNG crew, it seems they wanted to get the entire cast in non-speaking roles, but only Jonathan Frakes and LeVar Burton were available, so they nixed it. I sure would have liked at least Riker to appear.

Third, a word about Odo. You mentioned in last week's review that if Odo and Kira were friends again by this week, you wouldn't buy it. Well, that didn't happen, and I thought it was nice continuity to see it adressed. But the off-screen resolution is a little disappointing. You might want to check the Memory Alpha article for this episode to see the much more status-quo-shattering resolution that was originally planned.

I agree about TNG crew at least being mentioned, and Riker is my favorite character from TNG, but Picard would have been an even more obvious choice. After everything with the Duras family, the Klingon civil war and his acting as Worf's Cha'DIch, the respect there is deep - on both sides. A voice only apology from Picard to Worf saying the Enterprise could not make it would have bee enough.

Okay, I'm really nitpicking here, but if Odo didn't leave Dax's quarters until 10:30am, how long had he been holding his shape for? He was on duty before he arrived at the party.

Just saying.

Just to throw in a quick comment about the never-seen talk between Kira and Odo in the wardrobe (or whatever that room was): While never seen on screen, it was put to paper in "Worlds of Star Trek Deep Space Nine" Part Three: Ferenginar and The Dominion. Even if you don't care about the relaunch books, the Dominion part is worth it for the Kira/Odo sequences alone.

Having TNG guys on the episode probably would have upstaged the new DS9 buds. Riker might have worked, but Picard would hav ebeen a bit more awkward, and having TNG there would almost demand some mention of the best left behind Worf-Troi stuff.

I love that episode. I've always found Worf and Jadzia's chemistry to be very evident and their love deep and moving. In my opinion they were the best star trek couple along with Troi and Riker, Picard and Beverly and Paris and B'Elanna.

Worf and Jadzia belonged together. Period. Stupid writers!

@Jade, it was Terry Farrell's decision to leave the show.

Yeah, she left to do "Becker", which was really a rather annoying show.

It's funny that she was erased from time Krenim style in the finale...she was totally absent from the montages.

@ justin, yes I know that but she asked the writers not to kill her character and she said that she would come back as a recurring character. They were so many ways to deal with her absence during the last season : there was a war and she could be needed in another post, she could have been injured and travel to Trill to recover or she could be missing in action and Worf could later find her during the last arc. Anyway, I think Jadzia and Worf belong together and that the writers built their relationship so beautifully only to destroy everything in the end. Not to mention that Worf already lost his first mate (and he lost so much along the way) and he deversed a happy ending maybe more than any other character. At least we don't have only one universe in Star Trek (Star Trek 2009) so maybe in another timeline they're happy together.

Great episode, one of my many many faves in season 6. Worf and Dax are awesome together and their wedding is absolutelly fantastic. Jammer I couldn't disagree with you more, I usually don't care about romance in sci-fi series but the chemistry between Worf and Jadzia is amazing. Since "The way of the Warrior" I've always thought that they should get together. They were very convincing as a couple and they seemed deeply in love. Having TNG cast would be great

I disagree with this review, Jadzia and Worf are one of the most passionate couples in Star Trek and the actors have such a great chemistry. The writers dropped the ball by killing her.

Hard to buy all of these rituals Worf says must take place when in TNG's "The Emissary" he said like one sentence and then claimed he and Key'lehr were married...without even asking her.

Are you kidding? No chemistry? Worf and Dax had the best chemistry than any other Trek couple!

@Chloe :

Tom/B'Ellana > Troi/Riker > Odo/Kira > Worf/Jadzia > T'pol/Trip > 7/Chakotay

@Elliott
In my opinion is: Worf/Jadzia > Troi/Riker > Tom/B'Elanna > Beverly/Picard > Seven/The Doctor > Janeway/Chacotay > Kira/Odo.


Ican't comment on Trip/T'Pol as I haven't watch all of Enterprise yet

For me it's Deanna and Will tied with Worf and Jadzia in the first place and followed by Picard and Beverly.
Back to the episode: it's one of my favorites in the series, only way to make it better would be if the Enterprise crew were present but I understand why that didn't happened.

A fun and heart-warming episode, a much needed after the six episode arc. The Klingon wedding ceremony was beautiful and Jadzia was radiant in her wedding dress.

The only reason people seem to think Jadzia and Worf have chemistry is because she "gets" Klingons. That's pretty damned racist and reduces Worf's character down to a snivelling stereotype. If Jadzia had chemistry with anyone it was Sisko. It would have made her stupid death scene somewhat more tempered if they had had the courage to pair them together. Worf's character demands he be extremely loyal and devout in his romantic dealings. That's why his relationship with K'Ehlar was so powerful, even though we saw her only twice. Then of course the awful season 6 of TNG came along and suddenly, Worf's everlasting devotion to the mother of his child is thrown out because they can't figure out what to do with him. So, sure, have him sleep with that half Romulan girl, and Troi and then Jadzia and then Ezri.

Anyway, couple that with the fact that Farrel and Dorn cannot, by any stretch, act effective romance and you've got a pretty boring couple.

I'd also like to know how Crusher/Picard can be considered a Trek couple. They were romantically involved in exactly two episodes and one scene of one bad movie. Then Picard went off with that Amish woman. Chokotay and Janeway? They were never a couple. Doc and Seven? What? Crushes are not relationships.

I'll tell you a relationship I wanted to see : Garek and Bashir.

I don't think that the only reason people like Worf and Jadzia together is because she gets Klingons. Personally, I believe that they're a passionate couple who were very deeply in love.

Pairinig Worf and Jadzia together was not planned from the beginning it came up when the writers saw the actors acting together which means that other people saw their on screen chemistry as well(s4 dvd extras).

Michael Dorn in a convention last month in the question of which series did he prefer TNG or DS9 he said that he loved TNG and it's still his favorite series overall and he enjoyed his time there more but he's more proud of Worf's love story with Jadzia in DS9.

But different people have different tastes and that the beauty of life.

If there is one character in Star Trek that doesn’t see the other characters as stereotypes of their races then that character is Jadzia. Seriously, Jadzia sees and accepts the individuals for what they are, not what race they are from.
She’s the character who can look beyond cultural differences and a person’s appearance and that’s why she’s friends with so many of the other characters. She sees Kira as Kira and not as another Bajoran, she sees Quark as Quark and not as another Feregi, she sees Julian as Julian and not as another human or later an enchased human.
Yes Jadzia understands the Klingon culture and maybe that is what in the beginning brings her close to Worf and they become friends but in my opinion she understands who Worf really is. It is Worf who understands and loves not another Klingon (and let’s not forget that Worf is not the typical Klingon)
And yes I believe the two actors act wonderfully around each other and they have a thick chemistry.

I agree with Irini, though I always regretted the death of K'ehleyr because the writers had in hand a potentially powerful couple. She had humour, charisma and the actress was good.

The Jadzia/Worf lovestory didn't disturb me though. But there were missed opportunities to make Work grow as a character: the enthusiasm of Jadzia and the mentoring of the great Martok.

What disturbed me is the fact that Odo's betrayal hasn't been revealed to the rest of the crew (cf. Dax/Kira scene in the beginning). And how Jake - who was part of the resistance cell - can ask Kira why Odo is avoiding her. I would have liked to see a Sisko/Odo debriefing before letting the compromised Odo return to duty.

On a light note, I will also vote for the couples:
Worf/K'ehleyr > Tom/B'elanna - Trip/T'Pol (if you delete the vulcan pressure thing from memory) > Troi/Riker > Jadzia/Worf > Sisko/Kasidy (and Picard/Eline ;-)).

@Elliot: Garak and Bashir! Most beautiful almost-couple EVER. They were natural, begging for it like crazy... Garak and Ziyal was cringeworthy.
Wish I knew which episode it was, but they had and awesome 'getting crap past radar' conversation.

That bit on the Jadzia "gets" Klingons makes a LOT of sense. It's like how Mormon Missionaries around here marry immigrants from countries they went to. For them, they get hot, exotic women. For the women, they get someone that speaks their language. If you ask *them*, they say they're in love, but it hinges more on that same type of "I get you" feeling.

You're right on the Crusher/Picard relationship, but I have a hard time not seeing a Crusher/Picard "relationship" because they (seriously... it's creepy) look like my parents. My Mom has similar hair and a similar build to Crusher. My Dad..., well, I tell people my Dad is Clark Kent to Picard's Superman. Ya know Picard's alias Galen--that's my Dad's name...


@ Everyone else: I wish weddings in RL were as cool as Klingon weddings. The weddings I've been to are BORING!

My problem with the episode is that it did too good a job of convincing me that Worf and Dax shouldn't get married. Worf is far too jealous and insecure to marry a woman who thinks it's okay to be rubbing up on a half-naked hunk the night before her wedding.

And that's just the most obvious incompatibility. Worf's whole thing is that he wants life to be predictable and make sense from his perspective. He's not into nuance and tolerance for opposing viewpoints. That's why he's so into Klingon tradition, despite not growing up with it -- it makes things simple and clear: do this, don't do that, follow the rules and you're good. Yet suddenly he's signing on for a lifetime of wondering what his wife is going to do next to freak him out.

Dax's previous lifetimes only makes it worse, because he's not just marrying a woman who's much less inhibited than him and has had exponentially more and longer relationships, but has had half of them as a man. That's a level of weirdness that should send a guy like Worf running for the hills.

Yes, Jadzia is very hot, and maybe the chemistry and the sex are great. But beyond that, what's Worf getting out of it except drama and stress?

If for nothing else, I like the episode for the party in Dax's quarters -- especially that funky dance she and Nog were doing.

I have to say, the Ferengis are damn fun at parties.

I had to LOL quite a few times during this episode, doesn't happen often with Star Trek. It was just full of silly fun. Bashir and O'Brien are a great comedic couple, especially O'Brien cracks me up every time with his dry remarks, even though his 'simple engineer' role is a bit stereotypical. Colm Meaney is quite the actor if that wasn't clear by now.

I'm going through all the DS9 episodes again on Netflix. I forgot how much I hated this one. Good thing about Netflix -- one can skip right over it and not miss a beat. Awesome.

@HawgWyld: This episode is pretty bad. But it really suffers because it's the first episode after the Federation retakes DS9 and after the very strong first six episodes (other than 'Sons and Daughters').

For whatever reason, the creators of DS9 occasionally sprinkled in "break" episodes at the worst times. 'Take Me Out to the Holosuite' and the other holosuite episode in season 7 (where Avery Brooks sings) are other examples.

I saw a recent story on all the ST series that said DS9 was the most daring series but that it suffered because it was produced during the transition to more serialized TV. I think that's exactly on the mark, and episodes like "You Are Cordially Invited" are perfect examples of the whiplash we sometimes got from this series.

To me, this was the funniest episode of DS9 so far.

While the plot left me with a shrug, many of the lines are absolutely brilliant comedy!

My favorite part was probably Bashir and O'Brien, hanging over a fiery pit, talking about how they're gonna kill Worf. Tacky, sure, but well written and well performed!

Oh, and I wish I'd been invited to Jadzia's party .. man, that looked like fun!

To all the people complaining about the "Enterprise not showing up"... the Enterprise was destroyed prior to DS9 Season 4 and its likely that the crew was transferred/reassigned/on leave. Not to mention the amount of time it takes for the new Enterprise-E to be commissioned, built, tuned & balanced, christened, etc...

Actually, "You Are Cordially Invited" took place after First Contact, so the Enterprise-E is doing perfectly well.

I don't think "why didn't the Enterprise show up?" is any kind of mystery, though. There's a war on. I'm sure we can all imagine Picard, Riker and Troi (and perhaps Data, Crusher and La Forge) sending voice congratulations. Kor was friends with *both* Jadzia and Worf and didn't show. Because people are busy in a war. (This also justifies Worf showing up to the Riker/Troi wedding in Nemesis, since there wasn't a war on there.)

@William B: That's all true. Also, remember that they had to rush through the wedding in just a few days so Alexander could attend. That probably would have made it rough for the Enterprise crew to show up on such short notice.

My only qualm with the way it played out was that Bashir -- who wasn't particularly close to Worf -- was included in the Klingon bachelor party. Everybody else there made sense. But Bashir was clearly just there to be funny with O'Brien.

It is too bad that Garak wasn't involved somehow in this episode, perhaps in making Jadzia's wedding dress. Seems like a perfect episode for that.

Passable wedding episode.

5/10

Rather obnoxious of Sisko to try and have it both ways...one moment he is telling Jadzia that she isn't Curzon and can't claim credit for his achievements, but then the very next moment is saying that she is 356 years old and should act like it.

Jack:

Sisko wasn't trying to have it both ways. It's all about understanding the context of what's being said. Telling Jadzia to quit specifically crediting her past accomplishments as Curzon is different than telling Jadzia to utilize the overall wisdom and experience in general of her past lives. Forest for the trees. She's justifying herself by specific accomplishments of one host that pertains to her current situation rather than utilizing the overall experience she's gained over the centuries.

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I've always really enjoyed this episode and whenever I've re-watched the series, this one is included. I don't know if it's the lightweight nature of it that's needed after the preceding arc of episodes or if it's really that good of an episode. So disregarding said arc, I will think of the episode on its own terms.

I've never found the charisma between Jadzia and Worf to be anything but what the story needed and it has always worked for me. A lot of it seemed believable enough and I just viewed it as that's their relationship and that's just how they interact. Unlike, say, the charisma between Foreman and Thirteen on House MD. I liked the idea of them together but more than one too many scenes fell a bit flat. In Jadzia/Worf's case also I noticed that in a few comments (earlier episodes) on here the relationship itself came out of nowhere. That's far from true and it was hinted at several times since Worf's arrival on DS9.

I'm still of the belief that ST hasn't done romance well in general, but there are romantic episodes that HAVE been done well. Quite well in fact. Unfortunately, it's been tried too many times and, even more unfortunately, in too many bottle episodes. Ones where the romance's birth and death hinge on what can be encapsulated in one hour. Not saying that it's never worked at all but that the percentages are not in favor.

Budding romances between major characters, however, is a different thing and is also an area where the ball has been dropped one too many times. Crusher and Picard, for instance, was a fantastic idea where the ball was dropped with an unceremonious thud.

All in all, though, this episode was rather enjoyable. Jammer hit the nail on the head when he said basically that it's not a must-see but don't necessarily miss it, either. The only mistake in this episode, and it's a glaring mistake, was to have the off-screen talk between Kira and Odo. That talk most definitely should have been a major part of a different episode and most definitely NOT something that would have simply been alluded to. I really can't fault the whole episode for it since it's not intrinsic to the plot. But even that minor scene was disheartening and disappointing because of the knowledge of it's reason for being there.

It be what it be. Fun to watch episode with plenty of grin-worthy dialogue despite some pedestrian 'seen-it-all-before' wedding fluff.

Just squeaks by into 3 stars for me.

A lot of disappointment to this episode, though it was saved by O'Brien/Bashir (KILL WORF) and Martok (by far my favorite Klingon). While the disappointment is all too expected (whenever Trek does interpersonal relationships on this level, it's always rife with enough cliches to make my head spin), I agree with Paul that these always come around at seemingly the worst times. Stuff actually relevant to the plot gets shoved to the side (Kira/Odo quite literally), and there isn't even a line referring to Ziyal, whose death was already anticlimactic to begin with aside from Dukat's spiraling. Guess Kira got over THAT one real quick. I mean, so did Garak, but seeing how he dealt with his own father, it's very much in-character, even if there's some underlying emotion he doesn't bring to the surface.

And then there's Jadzia, who has been through five marriages, and yet can't seem to grasp what marrying even entails...

I'd say 2 stars, with reservations... It's not terrible, but after everything that's happened, you'd think MAYBE there could have been less boring fodder for the writers to tap into.

"How hollow is the sound of victory, without someone to share it with? Honor gives little comfort to a man alone in his home, and in his heart."

The two scenes with Martok and Sisko are wonderfully acted, and for me, brings this episode up to 3 stars.

Also, scenes like that provide character development that just isn't found in as much depth in TNG (outside of Picard).

Jonathon,

Completely agree regarding Martok/Sisko!

Shannon Cochran played a very good Klingon "goddess".

Again, Martok has GREAT lines and delivers them without skipping a beat :-)

"MARTOK: I shall endeavor to die this year, if possible." ... to be followed by "Isn't she magnificent" :-)

I really enjoyed the wedding when they finally got there. The best part I thought was Sirella's line:

SIRELLA: And when the two hearts began to beat together, they filled the heavens with a terrible sound. For the first time, the gods knew fear. They tried to flee, but it was too late. The Klingon hearts destroyed the gods who created them and turned the heavens to ashes. To this very day, no one can oppose the beating of two Klingon hearts. Not even me. Worf, son of Mogh, does your heart beat only for this woman?

When she said "not even me" I choked up. I know, I'm a sap :)

I also liked Sisko not copping out to Jadzia's woes (like he normally does). He put her in her place quite appropriately!

I’ll go a little higher than Jammer. 3 stars for me.

I feel like the only reason Jadzia got with Worf was because he is klingon. It always annoyed me how Jadzia seemed to want to be a klingon. Just because Curon worked with Klingons she knows all their rituals, songs and beliefs. I never felt any chemistry between them. I was glad they killed her when she quit the show. I know she offered to do part time work the last season but I'm sure the writers felt like if she was gonna leave them with one season left then Jadzia had to die. Ha. And what's with worf thinking she will be in stovokor. She isn't klingon and shouldn't his woman from tng be waiting for him.

Some friends of mine are watching through DS9. I tried joining them one night a while ago, and one of the episodes I caught was Meridian. I didn't return until the other night, when I caught this episode and the next one.

I'm sorry folks, but this episode is pretty bad. There are a couple of good things I can say:
1. Bashir (since when is he Worf's choice for a ceremony like this?) and O'Brien are awesome. Meaney is as good as ever in the role.
2. Some of Martok's lines, while still a bit too cheesy to really resonate with me, have some worthwhile stuff to say.

But the bad far outweighs the good here:
1. Alexander is here.
2. Worf and Jadzia don't seem to be a particularly good couple.
3. The crew is inept - how do things get done when security officers join parties, and/or miss their shifts?
4. I still don't like Brooks' acting.
5. The most potentially interesting scenes are kept offscreen:
5a) Odo and Kira
5b) Jadzia's final meeting with the Klingon lady
5c) O'Brien and Bashir attacking Worf

I could probably go on, but I'm sure anyone reading this gets the idea. Contrast this bullshit with the O'Brien wedding (Data's Day). For one thing, it wasn't the entire focus of the episode. For another, even not knowing Keiko at all before that, there was a definite feeling of wanting the wedding to succeed. I'm not certain that Worf+Jadzia will be good for either of them, so I can't decide if I want this wedding to succeed or not. Also, the TNG episode gave us the single best Data-face ever. It's a bit unfair to use that in a comparison with this episode, but I'm doing it anyways.

Maybe most importantly, the predictability of the standard 'wedding-drama' is used playfully in Data's Day - Geordi has to make it clear to Data that, despite Keiko's protestations, Data should be ready to proceed with the wedding. After all, that's how these scripts play out. The script has a tongue-in-cheek feel that makes it fun even if it's unsurprising at the end. Meanwhile, this script's predictability just makes it dull.

I'm surprised so few commented on Alexander. He is *painful* to watch. He's over-the-top inept; and worse, he seems OK with it. Maybe a human could be content to be the fool, but a Klingon warrior?
He needs to stumble into a heroic death, and quickly....

I wish the Odo-Kira fallout had been shown too. Memory Alpha says the initial plan was to have Odo isolate himself from the crew outside of work situations. But without being able to see where it would lead, the writers didn't want to paint Odo's character into a corner.

Anyway, it's a silly episode that mostly works even with all the cliches. It's just fun to wind down with the crew after the heavy storylines they just survived. Dax's party is a lot of fun, and I liked how Kira and Odo talked all night in private. It was basically a college party. Dax and Nog should get down more often.

Guilty pleasure, so 3 stars.

Again, most of what I thought about the episode has already been said, but my pet peeves about this story were:

a) How they didn't show the final resolution between Sirella and Jadzia, and as a former comment pointed out, this episode did a far better job of showing how incompatible Worf and Jadzia are, than selling me on the reasons they should get married.

b) I was very disturbed by how awful Sirella was to Jadzia. No one's ever mentioned this before, so maybe it's just me? Anyway, I didn't care for Sirella's blatant xenophobia or disrespect to Jadzia. Perhaps the two of them worked something out - again, this links back to my first point, that we should have seen a scene of sorts where both acknowledge their "wrongs." I also did not care for how insistent Worf was that Jadzia cave in to his demands.

c) The way the Odo/Kira situation was resolved. I thought Kira was a person who didn't forgive easily, and with Odo's betrayal, they came this close to total annihilation by the Dominion. The fact that Kira was the one to reach out to Odo, rather than the other way round, was simply implausible. It should have been the other way round, considering that it is Odo who is in love with her and Odo who betrayed her.

Apart from the above gripes, which ruined the episode rather, it was enjoyable. Jadzia's bachelorette party was a hoot, and the Polynesian lieutenant's expression when he bumped into Worf on the way out was hilarious. Ditto for poor Miles and Julian's various reactions to the Klingon bachelor rite Worf puts them through.

Jadzia was better off with Deral than Worf. Who cares if Jadzia wishes she were klingon. They should have put her with Bashir which is where the show would have gone if Worf hadn't arrived. Lazy writing. Quark and Jadzia would have worked as well

The only reason I suffer through this whole episode is for the "Klingon Bachelor Party" scenes. Bashir and O'Brien are great in these scenes. The Wedding ceremony isn't bad, either.

Agree so much with Elliot's comments above. Also loved the point someone made about Odo's regeneration. It's also strange that the lady of Martok's house could come, but not Enterprise crew.

I'm watching this for the first time and while the earlier Dax was one of my favourite (if not THE favourite) character, I'm just waiting for the character to die and leave the show. This episode had so much potential (EVEN accepting the ridiculous couple these two make). Actually let me just point out that marriages like these are the ones that a lot of people in less democratic and egalitarian situations feel they 'have' to stick on with, and lead to endless unhappy days full of discontent and verbal violence. Le sigh.

Worf and Dax should have had an affair, to satisfy Dax's curiousity. That is ALL that could possibly exist between them. If Worf had been at his best, he would have been amused with Dax, but not interested at all. He and K'ehlar worked so well precisely because she stood up to him.

Sisko telling Dax that Worf was like a kid who had to be indulged, the wedding vows where she is the 'stronger heart and wiser' - thereby giving the male heart to be less wise, do what he likes, etc. All that is patriarchal rubbish, sadly.

But the episode DID have potential as scenes with Klingon women and secure Klingon men (like Martok) always do.

On a side note, all Worf has done so far is feel 'ashamed' of and 'look down' at who someone connected with him really is (Alexander and Dax). Surely, it's more 'honorable' to be true to who you are, even if the world disapproves? Now there were glimpses of that in the TNG Worf. Worf here is like the most annoying, conservative parent who cares WAY too much about every random bigoted stranger's opinion. Married life would have been hell for them both.

Re the part of Elliot's comment on Bashir and Garak as a couple: a thunderous "Amen!"

Re the chemistry between Worf and Dax: it is there, but I would so much prefer K'Ehleyr. I also really liked Deanna and Worf in the alternate timeline TNG episode. Worf and Dax do love each other, but they aren't even remotely compatible.

I know somebody above didn't like it, but I absolutely loved the end where Bashir and O'Brien desperately wanted to go at Worf. The maniacal look on Bashir's face was priceless to me!

All in all, I really dislike Worf & Dax as a couple, but worse relationships have stayed together I guess.

DS9 is definitely the Star Trek show that makes humor work the best. Great episode. Every punchline hits.

Yes, it's fluff and yes it follows a predictable narrative thread. But by God this is fun, lighthearted and with a spirit and verve that I find a joy to watch, particularly after the heavyweight episodes preceding.

There are so many good scenes here. Anything with Martok in - the harmony singing is glorious - and the party - Morn chest-bumping the Bolian - are particular highlights. having Dax back to the fun Dax of earlier series is also good. And the Klingon rituals are also great - any race that celebrates in the wedding ceremony that they killed their gods and burned heaven has to be admired.

"We do not embrace other cultures, we conquer them!" indeed. 3.5 stars.

Obviously not possible, but my first thought was also that worfs "closest male friends" would've included Riker and Picard, at least. Two characters that worf had far stronger chemistry with than anybody on ds9 with the possible exception of martok.

I don't think TNG guys should have been in the episodes but I do think that either some dialog about them being unavailable should have been written in (perhaps a mention by obrien and a comment by worf) or something other than "closest male friends" should have been used (perhaps comrades in battle or something).

After the rather intense seven episode war arc, this is exactly what "Deep Space Nine" needed - a lightweight comedy episode that actually delivers on its humor. After everything that has happened, the characters (and audience) deserve a chance to relax.

First off, I love the character of Sirella, or at least her interactions with Dax. God, it was so refreshing to see Dax have to deal with someone as stubborn and demanding as herself. Worf is generally hard-headed, but usually whenever he and Dax find themselves in a disagreement it ends with Dax getting her way (yeah, I'm looking directly at "Let He Who Is Without Sin..."!). Watching Sirella not put up with any of Dax's arrogant, valley-girl nonsense was so refreshing! And, having Sisko talk some sense into her was refreshing as well. I haven't made a secret of my dislike for Dax before, so this probably shouldn't come as a shock to anybody.

Second, I simply adore how extravagant the wedding ends up being. Trek often has a tendency to do weddings that are really small in scale. In TOS: "Balance of Terror" there's a wedding, but it's done in the ship's chapel with Kirk presiding and practically no frills. TNG: "Data's Day" has the O'Brien's getting married, but it's also a fairly low-key affair. Rom and Leeta exchange vows with few frills. Sisko and Yates will end up getting married in the Wardroom on the spur of the moment with absolutely no frills. Over on VOY, Paris and Torres will get married in "Drive", but OFF-SCREEN! Small weddings are something I've simply never understood. This is supposed to be one of the pivotal moments of your entire life, treat it so! I mean, to each their own, but a small wedding is definitely not the way I would go - give me a huge Catholic wedding with all the trimmings! So, it's nice to see the franchise FINALLY doing something like this.

Third, like I said, the humor actually works. Given that Ron Moore isn't exactly known as a comedic writer - and, in fact, shares some of the blame for the horrible Ferengi "comedy" episodes - I have to give massive credit where it's due here. Everyone backing away from Bashir so he'll have to endure the next test first creaks me up every time. LOL!

I used to think there were two major problems with the episode. First was how Kira and Odo resolve their difficulties in a closet. But, the comments in the "Behind the Lines" thread have convinced me that this isn't as bad as I originally thought, so I won't hold that against the episode anymore. Second, however, is Martok and Sirella's relationship. While I love that Sirella throws Dax's bullshit right back in her face, I have to ask myself "what does Martok see in this woman?". Worf and Dax show little chemistry together? Hell, their chemistry is off the charts compared to this couple. For all intents and purposes, Sirella treats Martok like shit! He even says... "She is a prideful, arrogant, mercurial woman who shares my bed far too infrequently for my taste. And yet I love her deeply." Umm.... .... .... .... why?! Seriously, give me at least some reason for why this man loves this woman so much. Unfortunately, we get nothing like that, so it's really the only flaw I can find in this otherwise excellent episode.

HOLODECK TOYS - 21 (+3)

9/10

Everytime I watch this episode, Jadzia always strikes me as someone who doesn't want to get married even though she says she does, like she wants the Single life when it suits her but also wants a partner. For example I mean the way, in the words of Lady Sirella, that she was acting like a "Risian slut", she certainly didn't act like someone who was getting married the next day, rubbing the chest of a random topless Lieutenant whilst subtly hinting she may want more from him in the coming hours, specifically the fact she woke up in her quarters with two men on her wedding day one of which was the man she was touching up the night before, that's a pretty bad sign.

Worf must really care deeply for Jadzia like no other for him to put up with her overly confident, flirtacious, wise-cracking tough, independent nature compared to his staunch, traditional, devoted reserved nature, either that or the love making was the best he's had and he didn't want to lose it, but I'd guess its the first one.

@ Joey Lock,

I think they missed some real opportunity to conclude the Jadzia/Worf relationship, even within the time they had available. But I guess maybe at some point they just said f--k it and wrapped it up simply as they did.

They make some efforts in seasons 4-6 to show that Worf isn't a traditional, normal Klingon, despite his fervent desire to be one. In fact, his honest desire to be a traditional Klingon makes him about the only one there is, from what we see. The rest of the Empire appears to view his kind of mentality as already antiquated, almost like Kor. Jadzia makes a few efforts to show Worf that she's perfect for him because what he really does need is someone who's as much of an oddball as him. Klingon, but too Human, just as she's Jadzia, but too Curzon. Between her background with Klingon culture, her acceptance of eclectic individuals, and her wild, passionate side, I really do see her and Worf as being perfect for each other despite their temperamental differences.

You're totally right that Sorella was basically correct about her. She wasn't really prepared to be married; at least, until she was. She was creating as many chances as possible to sabotage it, and Benjamin basically just tells her to grow up. I mean, Curzon died on Risa for Chrissakes, and unless Jadzia wants to live that life again she's got to drop the crap and get real. Worf went through this with her previously in "Let He Who Is Without Sin", where he had to deal with who she was, and now SHE has to deal with who she really is. She wanted everyone, from Benjamin to Sorella, to treat her with deference as if she was still Curzon. She even took liberties with Worf, and at her engagement party, apparently clinging to his persona and doing the kinds of things she remembered him doing.

But aside from her conflict with what kind of person she wanted to be, I do think Worf recognized that he's never find someone as unique and well suited to him as she was. I mean damn, how many non-Klingons could train against him with a Bat'leth, speak Klingon, understand his ways, and know how to calm him down without merely placating him?

My couples rankings:
Odo/Kira > Troi/Riker > Tom/B'Ellana > Worf/Jadzia > 7/Chakotay > T'pol/Trip

For Troi/Riker, I'm including their moments together in the TV series, even though they weren't actually a couple then. If you include only Insurrection and Nemesis, they'd probably be lower.

I have no complaints about what was shown. My biggest complaint is what wasn't, that is to say the two most important conversations in the episode were M.I.A. First, the reconciliation between Kira and Odo takes place almost entirely off-camera. Second, the reconciliation between Dax and Martok's wife takes place almost entirely off-camera. C'mon!

Odo and Kira's reconciliation taking place offscreen was a huge wasted opportunity. Sigh.

Even accepting that Worf would only choose main characters from this show and not TNG to be his best friends, his choices seemed random. Why Bashir and O'Brien over Garak or Odo?

Miles has reached out to Worf repeatedly and has known him since his TNG days. Odo and Garak are not Starfleet, and while Word developed respect for Garak in By Inferno's Light I don't think it overrides the huge differences in their values. Bashir -- well, that is a bit more random, but he is a Starfleet colleague and is close with Jadzia; we can maybe imagine Worf feeling like he should make nice with at least one of Jadzia's close male friends besides Sisko, and preferring Bashir to Quark.

Worf, not Word. Stupid autocorrect.

Alternatively, Worf knew Bashir would be miserable on the path to Kal'Hyah, and got a little pleasure from making his romantic rival squirm.

Cute episode. 2 stars for the novelty of seeing a Klingon wedding, and Jadzia&Sirella scrap at the party. At that point I was about to crow "yea, catfight" before it all ended all too soon. Aww too bad...

No more then 2 stars, since I never really thought J and W belonged together. And the bachelor party scenes were just a bore.

[excited shriek] Worf and his Miss Kronos sash finally get their dream wedding. Too bad Miles, Sisko, Bashir, Alexander, and Dax have to suffer to give Worf his special day -- the special day he's been planning since he was a little boy!!

At least Dax gives Martok's racist wife a piece of her mind. The men just put up with Worf's backward culture. Weak.

Also, don't they have wikipedia at DS9? Maybe look up what a Klingon Bachelor party is before agreeing.

@Luke See, I really wanted to like that Jadzia is for once treated as in the wrong and gets called out on her arrogant behavior. Problem is, well, is she really all that wrong in this case? Sirella is being difficult to her for admitted racist reasons and and acts like the injured party after pulling out a knife (even by klingon standarts, she coulda just punch her). I was genuinely enjoying Jadzia calling her out on her "my grandma was a princess" bullcrap. I guess given how she acts during the wedding, it could have been just a test but I think it should have been made more clear. Kinda reminds of how in Lower Decks, they had a test like that, except the point was one should stand up for themselves. I agree Jadzia was just being passive agressive confrontational with the party, but is it really that much worse than Sirella being straight up agressive?

And Worf... Like, she tells him she doesn't want a klingon wedding like Worf wants, so he storms off. But Martok then convices him to stop being stubborn and be willing to compromise. So he goes to Jadzia... an tells her to do what he wanted. How generous of him. Yes, Jadzia was doing pretty much the same thing in Let He Who is Without Sin, but I didn't like her there either.

No way: Sirella is racist... "Risian sluts, weak Trills... n****, jews... etc"... Sirella is a stupid racist asshole. Worf is a mad dog, Klingons are untrustable drunk space pirates (again), their cousin is... CRAP! Seriously: living worms in a sort of mud?

Federation: join an alliance with us: Romulus is the better choice!

*Better cuisine (and no worms in the mud)
*Blue beer
*Our cold war is a bluff... We only bark by the neutral zone to keep Starfleet awake
*And we don't attack your colonies and helpless hospitals
*We don't care of tribbles
*We let u call us "Romulus" in "Earthian" translation and don't cut your head with a bat'leth
*We dont have stupid bat'leths
*We resurrected Tasha
*We gave u a pendrive for Data's backup
*We copy-paste your favourite captain
*Our D'deridex ships are BADASSIC!
*Klingons, breaking Khitomer Agreement, attacked your colonies and betrayed u. We, breaking Algeron Agreement, gave u cloaking devices.
*We are a sort of amusing Vulcans
*Klingons are a sort of boring Kazons
*We had Jean-Luc Picard 2.0 as emperor. Klingons still have that Kahless 3.1 (as emperor)
*We have Donatra, Klingons have Sirella and her stupid fake grandma
*Tal Shiar is fine, Obsidian Order is OUT. We r cool!

Federals, enjoy Romulan Star Empire! We are COOL!

The Bashir/O'Brien thing was hilarious.

I talk about my personal trainer this way whenever I'm cripplingly sore the next day.

First, I agree with others that it was highly strange that none of Warf's friends from the Enterprise were even mentioned. Maybe they're on some important mission that won't allow them to come to DS9, but talking to one of them on the view screen, or even a throwaway line of dialogue on why they can't make it would have been appreciated.

Second, watching Jadzia and Warf's relationship is bumming me out even more on this re-watch than it did the first time I watched DS9. That is because I've since had a relationship in which I was in love but our personalities weren't a good fit, and I'm convinced it's a horrible idea, even when you love each other. Warf is always trying to put Jadzia's fire out, and I don't like it. Every other male on the station has a crush on her, and she could do better. And by better, I mean someone who won't try to change her or tame her. As others have said, maybe the Warf we saw later in TNG would be a good fit with Jadzia. But they're writing him too serious and obsessed with tradition in all these eps with Jadzia, and it's making me feel bad for her. I mean, I love Warf, but he's not a good influence on Jadzia. Bleck.

Biggest problem with this episode, though, is that "the big talk" between Kira and Odo was off screen! His was a horrible betrayal, and I wanted to see that talk more than anything else that happened in this episode. Maybe we'll see more about it later. . . but I wanted to hear that INITIAL conversation. I think Kira should still be realllly angry with Odo. And in fact, I don't even think she should have allowed him to remain head of station security at first, after what he did. She obviously didn't tell the Star Fleet people who were off the station what he did. And she should have. They should know he can't necessarily be trusted! But they looked pretty buddy buddy when Jadzia found them talking! Come on, she was more awkward with him just after finding out he was in love with her, and less awkward now. . . when he's a possible danger to the station?

An hour of levity after a few serious episodes -- can't take this one too seriously but it wasn't particularly enjoyable either with plenty of cliches and the expected pre-wedding complications, different styles of "bachelor parties". Almost felt like I wasn't watching Trek.

I just don't get the romance between Worf and Dax -- the 2 actors don't portray it well. Worf is particularly wooden here. I don't think the clash of cultures here is analogous to any 2 human religions or races that I know of -- so there's no commentary on any kind of real world situation that I can see this applying to.

Sirella, Martok's wife, is super-annoying, needlessly heavy-handed with adherence to Klingon tradition so you know the headstrong Dax will rebel. But I guess somehow she's ultimately cool with the wedding after Dax supposedly goes begging on her hands and knees -- would have been nice to see that after seeing all the friction between the 2 earlier.

We didn't get to see a softer side from Worf really -- not even any real joy. The whole Worf getting married could have been a much more meaningful thing.

1.5 stars for "You Are Cordially Invited" -- another episode of DS9 staff getting to act out a (mostly) fun episode unrelated to the main story arc. Sometimes these outings work ("In the Cards") but here it really didn't for me. The episode focused too much on the unimportant aspects of the marriage and less about any character development.

I think DS9 as a whole is pretty anti-TNG, at least Behr was, so it's not surprising that Worf's past on the Enterprise and connections to its crew is generally greatly downplayed so not real surprising (even if it hadn't beeen it's easy enough to assume that both the actors and characters were just too busy).

Agreed that a lot of the interactions worked well, particularly between Worf and Dax, and Worf and Martok and Sisko and Dax, but Sirella was too extremely unpleasant, so much so that for Dax to have to beg to her felt like too much and for it to not be shown but still end with her feeling very warmly to Dax felt like really too much.

I think the conflict between Dax and Sirella could been a lot better if Sirella thought Dax was over-playing her connection to Curzon and thus her Klingon-ness rather than just directly racism/xenophobia, openly against any non-Klingon and supposedly that she's less physically strong.

I don't blame Dax for either having mixed feelings about getting married or remembering & being affected by having been married multiple times before.

@ Andrew,

I agree with you that the episode would have been much stronger had Sorella's attitude really come out of an actual attitude problem from Jadzia. As it was I think no matter how Jadzia behaved she would have treated her the same way. I get the "you're not a Klingon" angle, but for Jadzia to have to be humbled it wasn't enough to just say that she should have to beg to be accepted into a Klingon house and not make assumptions. It should have also involved a humbling of the Jadzia/Curzon character of feeling like they're entitled to whatever they want. There's something in common, in a way, between the Curzon persona and between Kor, in that they both feel above others in some way and that they should be considered as privileged in some way. I would have liked Sorella's attitude to come directly out of "you are not Curzon" and for Jadzia to really be put in her place and have to stand for herself, rather than as 'new-Curzon'. The episode didn't really go there and instead what we got was Jadzia basically having to grovel because marriage is important and she should do whatever it takes to make it work. That's an ok message, but it barely even told that message. We end up with a kind of mishmash where some of it is Jadzia not sure if she wants to settle down, and some of it where she's proud but has no good reason to keep hoisting up that pride over what she wants. The scene with Sisko is excellent but it's not enough to really give us the story that should have been here. I like this one, but it comes short of really giving us what we should have gotten about Jadzia's character weaknesses.

This episode may disturb alot of fans but it is a needed break from the horrors of war.The ever present war drum is beating in the back ground.Alexander is the dutiful son but accidental warrior, is being transferred to a vessel that appears to suffer high attrition(which Klingon ships dont?) )and his fate is uncertain.Jadzia,s behaviour certainly brings in a maddening chaos one would not expect a disciplined,order and structure type old school Klingon to desire ,but opposites attract.Sirella is magnificent and to see the great Martok humbled before her speaks volumes.She has her mission to note disapproval but still test what looks to her to be a pretender in Jadzia.If her disapproval is Xenophobic,oh well we"We dont absorb alien cultures,We conquer them !"The fact that there is a reconciliation and a welcoming Jadzia to the house of Martok is basically acceptance and a warning command to drop the subject and cease making waves.Doctor Bashir does appear to be a fifth wheel but he is important to Jadzia and O Brien so perhaps it was an attempt to include an important male from Jadzias past...to test him and let him know she now is unreachable.The zeal and glee in Bashir and O Briens eyes as they attack after the ceremony,s completion is fantastic.Kudos to all,20 years after this is still a very powerful episode.Qapla ,Kreuer ,IKV Fatal Diplomat.

Yet another Klingon episode - meaning it's full of asspulls about Klingons that make no goddam sense whatsoever. Their only purpose is to make the Klingon culture seem "alien".

I'd almost rather watch a Ferengi episode.

Almost.

Just re-watched the war/occupation arc concurrently with the final weeks of Discovery, and this is a nice palate cleanser

Unsurprisingly, the best parts of this episode have nothing to do with Worf or Dax, in order of precedence:

1. Martok's repartee with his illustrious wife is one of the best (hell, ONLY) depictions of a Klingon marriage. The fact that she immediately starts out with insults and wonders why the hell he hasn't frikkin' died already, followed by him jovially promising he'll try to die "this year, if possible", is a hilarious exchange I will never tire of. I do hope Hertzler lands a role of some kind on Discovery, he's second only to Andrew Robinson as my favorite supporting actor in Trek, and Hertz has played a LOT more characters.

2. Martok telling Worf he can't interfere in his wife's domain, then discouraging Worf from talking to her either because she doesn't really like him either - more comedy gold with a firm foundation in Klingon culture. Like meeting his wife at the airlock, Hertzler's line delivery is PERFECT. Martok brough Worf into the house against his wife's wishes, and she's accepted the fact "there's nothing she can do about it!"...but Martok dare not push her farther when it comes to new family members. Worf's "how comforting" is his best line in the episode.

3. Some great O'Brian-Bashir interactions this week, with the added dynamic of Sisko and Alexander, none of whom know what they're getting into. But at the same time, all of them stick with it (until of course they learn the wedding is off, then anything goes), because despite Martok saying no one would think any less of them if they gave up, they know better.

4. Quark and Dax's friendship showing in their shared suggestion that they simply hold the wedding at the bar...which doesn't sound so great, but it's more than a bar, it's a great space to hold a wedding! I also enjoy the irony of Dax getting married in the same place she had an arbitration hearing a few years back ;)

5. As quickly and cleanly as Odo's betrayal was swept under the rug with a single act of redemption (bailing Kira and Rom out with his security forces) left a bad taste in the mouth, Kira and Odo finally deciding to find someplace quiet (Dax's closet) to talk felt like a very realistic and relatable way to try to mend fences. I especially liked Odo telling his deputies they could join the party...Odo's a great boss!

6. Nog's bizarre werewolf(?) dancing/growling at Dax's party. I'll admit I dance like that sometimes at parties...and I those who know what I'm referencing are truly worthy of my friendship.

"Let rivers flow from our veins!" -Martok

One of the funniest episodes of ANY show, imo. I haven't laughed like that in a long time. I felt like Martok was channeling Michael Palin in some scenes. And Bashir's "I'm going to kill Worf" is too good.
Anyone taking this episode seriously is missing out. As Captain Sisko alludes to in the beginning, this is the break everyone needs.
For once I really didn't mind Dax, and I thought Worf showed more personality than in virtually any other episode. I really felt like the plot was irrelevant; episodes like this are a little gift to fans. I'll never forget "The Trial of Anguish" - I'm glad Klingons properly - and honestly - prepare for marriage!
Martok as usual was incredible, he's such a dramatic Klingon. His speech "Honor gives little comfort to a man alone in his home and in his heart," managed to somehow be hilariously over the top, and really touching.
My only nitpick was the ceremony, which abruptly ends with Sirella saying "this man and woman are married." The appropriately stylized and passionate Klingon ceremony seemed to grind to a halt and she's like, okay, it's over. (I imagine Ron Moore getting a call as he was writing it and being told "we need the script in an hour," because that part didn't seem to be fully written.)
As for the nitpicking about Worf's friends, TNG, etc., the tradition is for Worf to spend that time with his "closest male friends." If all Klingons are anywhere near as literal as Worf, then it is obvious that his male friends on the station are physically closest.
A final note, I agree with whoever said that Odo and Kira having a conversation off-screen lends more depth and realism to the show; American television is often very obvious; and I thought it was a nice touch that they had a very personal and intense conversation off screen. I would even go as far as to say it was none of our business.

There are some really fun moments in the Klingon bachelor party between O'Brien and Bashir. There are some strong moments with Martok and Worf, Sisko and Dax, and Quark and Dax. But the main story of this episode is incredibly slight and weak. Worf and Dax's lack of chemistry really hurts this one from reaching the heights of other 'fun' DS9 episodes. OK, but nothing special.

2 stars.

After reading some of the other comments, I realize 2 stars might actually be a bit low. The main conflict in this episode worked better than I initially thought.

2.5 stars.

Martok is a pretty fine character but... What a "lovely" family.
Drex is a total douchebag, Sirella is simply a BOOR. I give a piss of her "ku klux klingon" foolishness. A boor is a boor.

Now I understand why Martok never tried to escape from that asteroid: compared to his wife, Enabran Tain was a lovable teddy bear :-D

I liked this quite a bit. I always enjoy lighter episodes that allow a look at the characters more then I like heavy political episodes. And FINALLY jadzia is given some substance. Most episodes she’s just a pretty smiling face with a few lines

Interesting to see the Klingon wedding rituals and ceremony. Imaginative.

Kind of a "take care of a few loose ends" ep, with the marriage and Odo and Kira talking it out.

No great shakes, some silliness, average offering.

Major objection: You don't put cheese on shrimp linguini.

I really don't get Worf's and Jadzia's relationship. They are just... so so incompatible. They have such different values and lifestyles, such different desires and expectations in a relationship, and they're just constantly annoyed with each other. We as an audience are *told* that they are in love, but to me they never *look* or *act* like they're genuinely in love.

I've seen some people complain that Worf is overly controlling and possessive of Jadzia, and I've seen some people complain that Jadzia doesn't take the relationship seriously, is overly "promiscuous" despite Worf's discomfort and dislike of such behaviour, and is in general apathetic towards Worf's feelings. I think both of these complaints are valid. There's nothing inherently wrong with the way Worf wants to have a relationship or the way Jadzia wants to have a relationship, I'm sure Worf could be perfectly happy with a traditional yet open-minded Klingon woman who shares his values and accepts him, and Jadzia would probably be very happy in a playful open relationship with someone who jives with her and jokes with her and whose company she actually enjoys, and who doesn't mind her general flirtatious attitude.

But Worf and Jadzia don't *respect* each other. They don't *care* about each other and what each other want. They refuse to make any compromises in their relationship. Despite their vastly different values and desires and expectations in a relationship, they each just behave as if their idea of a relationship is right and the other person is being selfish if they want anything different.
Worf wants the relationship to be exactly a certain way, he wants Jadzia to act exactly a certain way, and he doesn't respect Jadzia's own desires and freedom and the fact that she may want to act another way or want the relationship to be a different way.
Conversely, Jadzia expects Worf to put up with all sorts of things she does that he's not comfortable with (e.g. teasing him, playing tongo with Quark, flirting with other guys) to satisfy her whims, but then she ignores and doesn't care about all the things which are very very important to Worf.

tbh, this quote from the episode pretty much sums it up for me:
"She says it's because he's a pigheaded, stubborn man who puts tradition before everything else. He says it's because she's a frivolous, emotional woman who refuses to take him or his culture seriously. You can see the problem."
"They're both right."

They're both mature adults, Worf and Jadzia *know* each other and what they value and how they want to live. They never should have gotten together if they're so incompatible. tbh, their relationship was a mess from the beginning. In "Looking for par'Mach in All the Wrong Places", Jadzia was just horny for Worf, while Worf was all like "we have had sex, therefore we must be in love and must get married". You couldn't have two more opposite extremes.

To be honest, that relationship was a series of lost opportunities, because contrary to public opinion I actually think they were well-suited to each other. What Jadzia most needed in this series was someone to reign in the Curzon in her, which had by S6 gotten out of control, and what Worf most needed was someone to kick him in the butt enough to remind him that despite loving Klingon culture he was certainly no traditional Klingon. This latter point we learned as early as Redemption. So while what Jadzia wanted was a fling, what would be good for her would be to have something actually stable; and while what Worf wanted was traditional marriage, what Jadzia had for him was that life should be fun as well as serious, a point he had been continually been failing to appreciate. But as the series decided to show us that neither of them wants to change, I would tend to agree that they're therefore not ready for marriage. But that doesn't mean they're not right for each other, assuming we take the pairing to be a sign of what each of them needs. Naturally, if they're too pigheaded to realize they need it then there's going to be friction.

I think the missed opportunity is that the friction should have come out of the fact that each of them is right; that they need what the other has, and that while being stubborn is endearing in a "good old Worf" sort of way, that's not what a relationship should be about. They're both strong-willed, so no doubt any bending on this front was going to come through some fireworks, which is what it should have been, but ultimately the message Dax supposedly learns from Sirella should have been learned through being with Worf. And what's worse, Dax seems not to have learned that lesson either way; not in this episode, and not subsequently. She should be smarter than that: it's one thing to be an ass like Curzon, but another to be dense. And being dense doesn't make sense for Dax. So I do consider this aspect of the relationship a failure. But as a straight pairing, yeah, I always saw it making sense. And should it come as a surprise that Worf's previous relationships were a half-Klingon who hated Klingon culture, and a Betazoid? Dax was basically the next logical step in this progression, with Worf being satisfied with not having a traditional Klingon woman, and yet also having someone with some of the martial aspects of a Klingon. Who else other than Jadzia could possibly have ever been suitable for Worf?

Sometimes I wonder if it isn't partially the movies' fault that Worf couldn't really develop as a character on DS9, especially in the romantic department. At the end of the day on DS9, Worf still needed to go back to the Enterprise-E (or whichever) as a security officer and be the same character longing for Troi he'd always been. That may have been a mandate by Paramount realizing that DS9 and TNG didn't share the same scope of an audience and they didn't want the original or casual TNG audience to get lost.

Yeah, I'd say that by later in this season the two developed a rhythm that made more sense for them (think of the Change of Heart Runabout banter, or his pride at her winning at tongo), but the path to get there was very bumpy. Nor do I think the central character realizations that Peter mentions were really explicit; I think to an extent Dax was moving toward taking her life and others' feelings more seriously, and Worf was moving toward acknowledging that Being Klingon wasn't his top priority, but it feels like those elements never fully blossomed. You could say it was cut short by SPOILER but really they had all of s4-6 (since they were setting up the pairing from wotw, arguably) to work on it, and a lot of it should have been clear by YACI in order to justify the marriage not being a mistake.

@Chrome, while it's true that might prevent some extreme Worf developments, I don't think Worf/Troi was really a factor in the movies. Besides Worf giving tacit approval for Riker/Troi in Insurrection, which feels to me to be subtly nodding to that triangle, W/T was never really referenced in the movies. Really besides requiring that Worf stay in Starfleet - - and I could imagine even that being worked around - - I don't think there were that many constraints placed by needing to continue to be in the TNG movies.

@William B

You may be right, because in fact the movies must have been geared to the extremely casual continuity fan (Wesley, of all people is back in Starfleet!). So maybe the TNG filmmakers were just playing fast and loose with canon and didn't really care what happened on DS9.

Oh, but I hasten to point out that Worf was slouched over, perhaps drunk, and miserable in Nemesis over Riker and Troi's wedding. So if we're going to stick all the events together coherently, Worf having lost Dax must have longed for his next closest relationship with Troi whom he also lost. That's why I wanted to point out that regardless of how close Worf and Dax got, Worf needed to harbor a flame for Troi.

@Chrome, that's not impossible as an interpretation. SPOILERS up to Nemesis, end of DS9:

Even if he is entirely over Troi, also, it might still feel like there are unresolved issues between him and Will, given that Worf didn't make a move on Troi in part because he didn't want to hurt Riker. And also while Worf felt more kinship with Jadzia than he would have with Deanna, I could see him, after having lost Jadzia, wondering whether it would have been better to get together with Deanna and maybe he would have avoided some of that heartache. Who knows, maybe Jadzia would still be alive -- she went to that temple where Dukat killed her to pray for getting pregnant with Worf's child, after all. I wonder if some part of Worf would wonder, deep down, if she would be alive if not for him. However -- this is speculation, and to be honest I don't really think that sounds like Worf, to me.

But I think it's also just that Nemesis wanted to do a "Worf drank too much Romulan ale" joke because it's funny (in theory) for super-strong bear Worf to be taken down by booze. That it's specifically Romulan ale is meant to tie into the Romulan threat. In fact if we want to give the movie credit (which I don't recommend), I think it's more about that Worf is finally letting himself open to Romulans -- and of course it violently disagrees with him, because he's hated Romulans his whole life. But by the end of the movie, we get the exchange:

WORF: The Romulans fought with honour.
RIKER: Yes they did, Mr. Worf.

So Worf's longstanding hatred of Romulans *as such* has finally dissipated and he can judge them individually, even though the notion hurts him (via the ale). End of character arc.

Because it's Nemesis, I mean, I'm not saying it's handled well or anything. But I think it's more about that than about Troi anyway, and even if it were about Troi, I don't think anyone on DS9 sabotaged Worf/Dax in order to, years later, make a joke about Worf getting sick from drinking because he's still pining for Troi.

I enjoyed this episode very much. I thought there were a number of humorous lines and it built nicely to a charming climax.

In a bit of retroactive continuity, it's clear that Sirella had some sympathies for T'Kuvma from Discovery Season 1. Sirella subscribes to an idealized version of Klingon history and worries that aliens are adulterating Klingon bloodlines. This sounds exactly like someone who would get seduced by T'Kuvma's ideology.

And despite 100 years' worth of changes to Klingon society between the two series, I doubt T'Kuvma's ideology has completely disappeared. (We know that there are still Molor worshippers in Kronos, for instance.)

All of this makes Sirella a lot less likeable than she already was.

All in all, I think this episode suffered from way too may cliches: the angry mother-in-law; calling off the wedding at the last moment; the caricatured Klingon bachelor party. It had its moments, and I enjoyed Jadzia's scene with Sisko and her Polynesian-themed party. And yes, I do think Worf and Dax had some chemistry; but the execution was still poor.

tl;dr: a fluff episode featuring some pointlessly OTT Klingon quasi-religious rituals, a bunch of wedding cliches and a couple who's relationship generally falls flatter than a Romulan pancake.

Or to put it another way: not an episode I found particularly fun or interesting.

Once more, Klingon culture is hugely stylised and masochistic; if they spend so much time being obsessed with these kinds of rituals, it's a miracle they ever found time to bootstrap themselves up into a space faring culture.

And then there's Worf and Dax. While it did start to become more plausible as Worf loosened up towards the end of season six, at this point, his humorless obsession with honour meshed very badly with Jadzia's freewheeling attitude to life.

(Which isn't to say that "quiet" people can't have strong relationships with extroverted people; I've got many friends with similar partner dynamics. But Worf and Dax simply never seemed to have enough commonalities beyond the fact that they both like martial arts and BDSM sex...)

I dunno. If I ever feel like watching through DS9 again, this is one of the episodes I'll probably skip!

After the opening scene, I thought I would hate this episode, with Alexander over-gesturing and knocking things over, I half-expected him to say “did I do that?” in typical Urkelian fashion. Thank goodness his role was smaller than I anticipated.

I actually rather liked this one, I would probably give it a solid 3 stars. It’s a necessary light-hearted diversion from the gritty, stressful war episodes that preceded it. Was the plot predictable? Of course. But that didn’t affect my enjoying it. There’s something nice about turning your brain off and seeing characters you like put a new spin on some familiar, if not cliched, themes. All in all, as a palate cleanser, I think it does a great job.

I also liked the scene of Odo and Kira coming out of a closet talking all night like a couple of teenagers. Great stuff imo.

How can anyone doubt Worf's counting Bashir among his closest friends, considering Bashir's efforts to keep Worf going during their time in the Dominion prison?

The ending of this episode had me nearly dead from laughter.

I agree with Austin's comments. This was a fun and emotional episode. Many years ago the episode had little impact on me. Now, it has great and personal impact on me.

@Chaz mTaz said, poignantly, "Many years ago the episode had little impact on me. Now, it has great and personal impact on me."

Ditto, my friend. Ditto.

https://youtu.be/WpmILPAcRQo

One would think there needed some mention where Captain Picard and the Enterprise D/E was in missing Worf's marriage.

"One would think there needed some mention where Captain Picard and the Enterprise D/E was in missing Worf's marriage."

Patrolling the neutral zone for stray comets.

Is it so hard to include a f'n SPOILER ALERT when mentioning MAJOR CHARACTER EVENTS in future episides?????

Not EVERYONE here has seen the whole f'n series!

This is why I was underwhelmed in the episodes about the wormhole minefield because, thanks to the assholes on this website (especially f'n Elliott), I knew the wormhole aliens were going to take out the massive Jem'Hadar fleet once in the wormhole. And that was a comment of his from one of the early seasons. Douchebag.

Y'all can burn in Hell!

^^ Hello Teelix!

It's a comments section on the Internet for a television series that's nearly 30 years old. People aren't going to post spoiler warnings, not even when you ask as politely as you have here. Maybe you should just avoid reading the comments until you've finished the show? 😊

@Teelix,

I think you should consider the entire site to have one big SPOILER ALERT. Its primary audience (only Jammer can tell you if that's its original target audience, but it has become the main audience over the years) is people who have watched a lot of Trek, having seen many of these episodes multiple times, who want to talk about details that may have taken us several viewings to notice, and to make connections (sometimes contrasts) between different episodes and series that in some cases appeared years apart.

That kind of discussion is hard to have if everybody has to walk on eggshells for the sake of people who haven't yet experienced any of the plot twists or surprise endings. I think it's fair for us to want a space where we can do that.

The people wondering why Worf would include Bashir in his "bachelor party"...I can see how they might have bonded a bit while they were imprisoned together by the Dominion a few months earlier.

It was really disappointing that once again, an all mighty reverence for "Klingon Culture" (whatever that happens to mean at the time) took precedence over everything else. This whole episode (which I forced myself to sit through in my latest rewatch of the series) starts with the premise that Jadzia has to jump through all these hoops. Okay fine, she wants to give Worf his fanboy Klingon Wedding. But this plot mirrors the Rom-Leeta wedding, where Rom is expected to jump through all these hoops, and the conflict comes from when he tries to embrace some of his own Ferengi culture, and he's chastised.

At least Jadzia smacked the crap out of Sirella. Sisko coming to yell at her felt really stupid and insulting. At zero point did anyone acknowledge that she was being disrespected. Sisko demeaning the Dax symbiont by saying Curzon was the one responsible for interacting with the Klingons was especially egregious.

Just a lot of one-sided, one-dimensional writing. One of the things I absolutely hate about Trek is its obsession with Klingon Culture and Klingon Honor (again, a completely amorphous term that throughout all series just gets used as a flimsy excuse for whatever the plot requires).

I mostly agree with Jammer, that this is a cliche wedding episode. I still have no idea why Worf and Jadzia really like one another, aside from their mutual connection to Klingon culture. Virtually every intimate scene with them is fluff flirting and witty banter. Later in the season when misfortune strikes Jadzia, I grieve for her character, but I feel no emotional resonance for her and Worf as a married couple. I felt way more resonance about Sisko's loss of his wife in the Borg incident that started the series, despite having never really seen them as a couple on screen together.

It's now 2022 and honestly, the same wedding tropes still play out across movies and television. The build up to the big day, the family conflicts (especially disapproval), the bachelor party, traditionalism, the last minute cancellation vs. the last minute rescue, yada yada. This is supposed to be the 24th century AND it's a wedding between a Trill and a Klingon, yet they turned it into the most cliche, eternally-human wedding drama. Booooring.

It was a real missed opportunity to deepen the narrative between Worf and Jadzia.

2022 - 25 years later - and these episodes hold up so well.

I don't disagree with the general consensus that there are some unfortunate wrinkles in this episode, but here and there there'll be some gem like General Martok's advice to Worf.

What strikes at the moment about my revisiting DS9 (I diligently watched the show when it was new), is just how good it is. It stuns me that the creative crew could consistently put together one quality show after another, year after year. Just working up the wedding ritual and the costumes for the wedding took someone a good deal of time. And they put out good stuff 26 (!) times per year for seven years. (Ok, Season One was only 20 episodes.)

The Berman/Pillar team was just hitting home run after home run as the series developed. By this point in the series, what I see when I look at Season 6, is *confidence*. In 1997, everybody knew their job; everybody, for the most part, executed the work superbly.

It's poignant to see Rene Auberjonois (Odo) & Aaron Einsenberg (Nog) and any others who created magic back in the 90s but who are no longer with us.

[If the unoriginal mercenary hacks who have unwisely been entrusted with the Trek franchise in recent years decide to scribble some mediocre remake graffiti on DS9, I'll be extremely unhappy. ]

@ JSylvester,

I fully agree about the confidence and professionalism every episode of DS9 exudes at this point. This show had become a well-oiled machine, with no hiccups in direction quality anymore or errant performances (like Siddig's in The Passenger). Voyager, too, had by around this time established a routine that was quite sparkling and reliable. I can say whatever else I want about the writing and show vision of VOY, but the cast and crew certainly seemed to be hitting their mark in terms of production and tone. Janeway's writing was all over the place, but that's a very particular writing room philosophy issue and not really a production or acting issue.

That said, DS9 by this time had also given the actors and directors so much leeway and so many chances for pure fun that they could easily let loose even in otherwise serious episodes. Between the Ferengi plots, hijinx with Quark, Mirror Universe episodes, and others like Bashir, Julian Bashir, I think they knew they could avoid always playing stolid (to use Q's word) Starfleet roles all the time. I've heard lots of flack over the years about Farrell - much of which I disagree with in fact - but here she lets down her hair, so to speak, in a way that no one in VOY ever seems to get to do. You can review the room given to the VOY actors to get their groove on and give us some outpouring of energy and enthusiasm, and you know what, loathe as I am to say it Neelix is probably the only character there who was really afforded the chance to smile and enjoy himself with abandon. I dislike what they made that character into, but I do like how they let Philips play. So I really appreciate that a Starfleet *science officer*, of all characters, is the one partying and enjoying life. In the abstract that's quite a striking thing in itself, putting aside the rest of the story. I also really like Sisko's scene with her following all this, where we get all her energy re-contextualized and fashioned by Ben into what it needs to be. Some object to that scene, but I appreciate it a great deal.

Regarding DS9 vs VOY, just bear in mind my comments above are intended to be understood as within the parenthesis of including VOY in DS9's achievement of pristine professionalism.

Okay, 27 minutes in, I called time on this one.

I like Worf, am ambivalent about Jax (nice caboose but that's about it), and scoff at their improbable relationship.

I'm not interested in make-believe rituals of make-believe species; it's simply not what I watch sci-fi for. The Klingon..."culture"...doesn't excite me in the slightest. Where on the Kardashev scale are those guys: like, MINUS 500!?

Big weddings and the drama that accompanies them don't resonate with me. I married my wife, an Emirati Moslem runaway, in a court building with just her, me, and the officiating staff present.

I understand some folks might enjoy, or at least tolerate, this one. As for me though, Next!

As said on several occasions I have never been a friend of the serialisation. Now, end of Season 5 and start of 6 there where 7 more or less joined episodes. I had forgotten them, or perhaps I did not feel in the mood for them the first time, now I binge-watched them. Including the loosely connected prequel “in the cards” and this sequel “you are cordially invited”. This makes 9 episodes. It worked, the seven episodes where thrilling and entertaining. The prequel is acceptabel and this sequel ... just when it ssems to lift it falls down and that several times.

Why did the serialisation work for me here this time? Well, learning to know the characters during 5 seasons that are double the newer development the characters had time to develop, and you had really the time to learn to know and like them. Here both actors and writers got challenged and the result was fine.

There has over the time been a lot of discussion regarding the Character Jadzia and the actress Terry Farell. Many are quite negative. I have mostly had the opinion perhaps Jadzia just is like that so why do not accept it. After this episode “you are cordially invited” I accept this criticism more than earlier. There is something missing in the characterisation or acting. I felt even Jake overtook her in the recent episodes.

I believe I can just express it like that there is just too little character in the character.

I found this episode novel on many levels and I always come back to it. The problem I've had with it from day one is that, like in almost all Star Trek romances, the writers infantilize the characters. This is the 24th bloody century and characters still devolve into concrete, immovable, two-dimensional people who require ridiculous levels of intervention to save their relationships. Not to mention we have a Trill whose combined memories makes her centuries old. She should be more like Guinan in how she responds to things. The level of immaturity on display is juvenile and grating. Not that a centuries old being "should" act a certain a way, but that the way situations are dealt with seem odd considering the insanely high levels of life experience these two individuals have. Worf is not much better.

But this is a theme in Star Trek. Look at how Sisko deals with Cassidy. He goes from being the competent Captain we know to being practically adolescent when there is conflict. I think the only Trek character who showed relative poise in a romantic situation was Picard in "Lessons", but that was short lived.

I'm convinced at this point that Trek writers don't know how to write good romance. Probably because they are sci-fi geeks. This problem persists into the more recent series too.

I have to agree that Dax seems like she's not ready for marriage, although I'd go further and argue that she doesn't seem ready for adulthood, much less as an officer. She just seems like a whiny, overly emotive spoiled baby, who generally says she's one thing and then acts completely different. (Her lack of professionalism while on duty is a constant problem with DS9.)

I agree with that commentators who say Jadzia doesn't take the relationship seriously, and I will go one step further and ask, what does she take seriously? There are no repercussions for her leading a foolish life, except to be given a new body. And the whole narrative about Jadzia being a Klingon warrior deep down is BS.

Martok makes this episode great for me. "Let rivers flow from our veins!" I also enjoy Alexander, his commentary is exactly what Klingons need.

Four days of fasting? Worf would have to be my very best friend for that! But, during wartime, men he serves with and respects would be sufficient.

Also what's the issue with Bashir's comment about marriage? Have you not seen his parents? Does he not have married friends?

I'm not a fan of this episode, but there were a few highlights, mostly with Martok as others have mentioned. But I want to point out one suble scene that impressed me: When we finally get to Jadzia coming up the aisle in the wedding, she's grinning widely at everybody as she enters, but the the time she reaches Worf and Sirella her expression is completely serious. I thought that was some very good directing there.

Still think the Odo-Kira nonconversation was a major flaw, though.

Be warned, it's downhill from there for DS9.

Don't get me started on Kira in season 6-7. While her uniform in the earlier seasons was bulky and not that pleasing to look at, in the later seasons we get the classic second skin male, lesbians and bisexual audience titillation suit. Sure, she looks great and her figure always motivated me to get back into eating disorders, still. At least the former model that played Jadzia was replaced by the not former model Ezri and none of that reaches insult to basic intelligence that was 7 of 9. And guys don't tell me for the millionth time that she had great stories. Of course she had, if you bring in a woman that is so !wow! that probably even heterosexual women questioned their life choices, then you want to give her a big chunk of the interesting stories. Jeri Ryan is an average actor at best which anybody can see in her career/filmography. If you think that she is a great actor, congratulations you are a heterosexual male. :)

@Booming not a great actor but well cast for the role and excellent for what the character was. I don't doubt her looks were part of why Berman et al. brought her on but looks aren't the reason the character was so popular.

She also had a far better post- Trek career than most Star Trek actors have managed.