Star Trek: Lower Decks

“The Best Exotic Nanite Hotel”

2 stars.

Air date: 10/31/2024
Written by Stephanie Amante-Ritter
Directed by Brandon Williams

Review Text

The final season of Lower Decks is off to a rocky start with this third lackluster episode in a row, in which the Cerritos arrives to help remove an infestation of nanites (that have merged to become a liquid-metal T-1000-like blob) from a luxury space station resort that features amazing amenities. Sure, I'd like to stay in this resort, but that doesn't mean I was entertained by what happens here. Three episodes in, and I don't think I've laughed out loud even once.

Boimler is selected to accompany Ransom and Billups on an undercover mission to retrieve an AWOL Starfleet admiral from the resort. However, Boimler becomes convinced he has been invited on the mission solely to be sent into danger and serve as the "canary in the coal mine" for the senior officers. It's a 100 percent Boimler Plot, and hilarity, as they say, ensues. Or doesn't. I suppose the funniest slapstick scene is the one that fully embraces the show's cartoon nature and has Boimler ski over a mountain cliff and somehow survive a hundred-meter fall into a snowbank. It wasn't enough to make me laugh, but the extreme long shot was a kind of clever visual gag.

The eventual reveal of Admiral Milius and his mysterious cult of vacationing followers is a random nod in the direction of Apocalypse Now. (Milius is vaguely inspired by Colonel Kurtz, and the show cites its reference by naming the character after Apocalypse Now co-screenwriter John Milius.) The cinematic reference, however, and the circumstances around it, are purely random, and fail to arrive at any real comic point.

Meanwhile, Mariner & Co. try to capture the nanite blob, which is set against the final mission for Jennifer — Mariner's occasional Andorian girlfriend — before she's set to transfer off the ship. In a "character" story that's of second-tier sitcom caliber, the story purports that Jennifer thinks she and Mariner are still in a relationship even though Mariner tried to break up with her a year ago, albeit not using the words that would avoid ambiguity. But, you ask, why wouldn't we have heard about this before? How could these two possibly go through their daily lives in a logical progression for a year while one thinks she's in a relationship called "Jeriner" and the other doesn't? Because, you see, this is a classic Idiot Plot where neither idiot is being honest about what's actually going on. The concept of Jennifer as Mariner's girlfriend has always been this weird lark-like afterthought of pieced-together vignettes. In a way, it's clever that it has only ever existed on the periphery of the series. But the resolution here is the third act of a concept that never had its first two, and it's tepidly written, featuring a bunch of evasion and bland bickering before we get to the fake sentiment.

As for the sci-fi plot: Lower Decks works best when there's a method to the madness, but so far this season there's been very little method — and, until now, even very little madness. Now we get a dose of the madness (albeit without the method). The metallic blob ultimately turns into a giant icosahedron of terror that bulldozes through town, leading to much loud mayhem. It's defeated by playing the right notes on Krog on the Rocks' vibe tubes. (Krog is T'Lyn's favorite musician, BTW.) These are random nonsense gags masquerading as humor. We have a massive 20-sided die rolling down the street, and it's populated by a tiny Intrepid-class Starfleet vessel from another dimension? Huh?

This show would do better if it used actual characterization to drive the comedy, rather than off-the-shelf sitcom parts, ironic detachment, and nonsensical "sci-fi" concepts.

Previous episode: Shades of Green

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6 comments on this post

    I enjoyed this episode, even if it was a little bit lower decks by numbers. It had little of the zaniness of early LDS, and it was more genuinely funny than the first two episodes of the season. It also had pretty complete (if out of nowhere) character arcs for both Mariner and Boimler.

    In the A plot, Mariner and company try and defeat a swarm of nanites while she deals with unresolved closure from her relationship with Jennifer. I'll admit I never cared about their relationship - I don't think the show ever wanted us to care, and Jennifer was honestly never characterized beyond kind of being a bitch (not being misogynistic here, that's all that's there). So the episode wisely instead focuses on Mariner's stunted emotional maturity/lack of communication skills. She has to put her big girl pants on in order to work together with Jennifer to save the others. Everything is put on speedrun, because this is Lower Decks, but this arc works well enough.

    I was, however, a bit disappointed with the nanites themselves. Like probably everyone, I was presuming these were the "smart nanites" that Wesley accidentally made in TNG, so having them be a big dumb object which operated out of plot convenience was pretty nowhere. The realization they're being "controlled" somehow by a microscopic Federation ship from another dimension was also just weird. I know this was to somehow link it to the season-long arc (which apparently involves the anomalies), but I was left with so many questions, given I don't think the ship was actively trying to destroy things/roll over people.

    Turning to Boimler's B-plot with Ransom and Billups, it was...fine? I feel like we've seen this dozens of times now. Boimler has often made a wrong realization, only to wise up in the third act. He's also frequently used as a show punching bag. I liked the idea of an admiral with "Boimler-like" elements tempting him to leave, but the dude is such an uptight stick-in-the-mud that there was zero tension - even manufactured tension. That said, elements of this were genuinely amusing, such as using slippery sunblock as part of a "fighting style."

    In the end, both plots should have been standalone episodes, as neither has time to say much profound about their characters given like 10 minutes of runtime. But the jokes here were better than in the first two episodes, so I still think this is an above-average episode of the series.

    This episode just could have . . . not. It treads well-worn ground. I thought the show had done a lot of work to evolve the characters past this, but here they are acting exactly as they did right back at the start of their arcs when the series began.

    And we didn't need to see Jennifer again. Nothing was added by revisiting her in this episode.

    The nanite swarm infesting the space hotel could have been a cool idea but then in the end it wasn't. No one did anything smart to solve the problem, just zany.

    The only thing positive I have to say is that the mission to retrieve an AWOL admiral who is sick of being assigned to milk space whales from a pleasure planet is a very Cerritos-type mission. Points to this episode for the concept, if not the execution.

    Well, I liked it. It was fun to have Jennifer back, and her crackpot lying is consistent with Mariner's behavior in other seasons. Mariner just doesn't like emotional confrontation, she even tried to make a whole holodeck movie to avoid it.

    As for Boimler's arc, it was a bit more predictable but I still laughed about the canary humor. There really isn't an animal that seems like it would be good at skiing. Although the reverse works; Goofy (dog?) trying to learn to ski and failing miserably is pretty funny. And as oddball as Milius was, I thought it was heartwarming that Boimler found something productive for him to do.

    3 stars.

    I've never been able to get past S1 of LD, but the title of this episode has me intrigued!

    How does this episode compare to The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel - which is a gem of a movie??

    Was anyone else getting mild John Williams / Superman theme music vibes as Boimler was lubing himself up getting ready to rescue his shackled colleagues? 😆

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