Jammer's Reviews

CNN Is a Joke

By Jamahl Epsicokhan

February 28, 2007

CNN is officially a joke. Either that, or the American public is a joke, which is a distinct alternate possibility.

As everybody knows — seeing as CNN covered it more extensively than the death of a president would likely be covered — Anna Nicole Smith is dead.

This just in. Anna Nicole Smith is ... STILL DEAD.

CNN.com, which has long been my favorite online mainstream-media nation/world news site (clean design, solid content), has been reduced to a shameless tabloid of "Entertainment Tonight" proportions. For the past three weeks, the top slot on CNN's web site has been dedicated largely — though admittedly not exclusively — to the latest who-cares update in the Anna Nicole Smith saga.

Yes, it was a legitimate breaking news story immediately after she died, despite the fact that Smith's fame in American society was inspired mostly by the can't-turn-away-from-this-train-wreck factor (although I turned away just fine, thank you). But now, here it is, nearly THREE FULL WEEKS later, and the story WILL NOT GO AWAY.

Competitors FoxNews.com and MSNBC.com are hardly blameless in this matter, but it appears they are at least back to a normal news cycle, and have mostly removed the Smith story from the No. 1 slot (albeit not from the top headlines).

CNN.com, on the other hand, is still running the story (the new development today being that the courts will allow her to be buried in the Bahamas; WHO CARES) in the top story/photo slot, with a wildly-overstated-for-this-story "BREAKING NEWS" strip across the top. This is beyond lame, beyond pathetic, beyond pandering. This is annoying the crap out of me, and solidifying CNN's reputation in my mind as a punch line. When I saw the headline on the news wire today, my first thought was, "Heh, CNN probably has it as their lead." I mentally laughed at myself and dismissed the notion as, "surely not." Nope. I mean yup; there's the lead: "Court clears way for Smith's Bahamas burial." BREAKING NEWS.

Here's some breaking news: CNN's news editors need a clue. Or whoever is twisting their arms.

Surely no one cares as much as the coverage implies. God, I hope not.

Maybe the mass number of CNN's page views from the dumb American public is proof that I'm wrong and CNN is right. In that case, it's also proof that CNN is complicit in being an enabler, giving the public its fix of witless celebrity train-wreck news, like a heroin needle to the vein.

This needs to stop, stop, stop. Please. Does this country have no credibility for its priorities?

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10 comments on this article

Ryan Galloway - Thu, Nov 22, 2007 - 11:34pm (USA Central)
Well said, CNN is officially a joke. Natalie Holloway is the headline AGAIN, and its been like three years since she was killed. How many African American teenage girls have been murdered in the US in the meantime without the slightest mention? Fox News is equaly shameful, but when will this race to the bottom end?
anonymous - Fri, Sep 19, 2008 - 12:57pm (USA Central)
Yup I agree with you... these days I find CNN is a republican website which always shows negative or something negative atleast on Democrats, where media is supposed to be unbaised agent. CNN doesn't post any news that gives negative impression on republicans... CNN hasn't posted any news about the investigation on Sarah Palin's power absue in Alaska where she and her republican mates are trying to delay the investigation ...
CNN also shows only good about republican's policies and bad about all other .. what a sucky and nasty website is that.... whereas I find good and unbaised news on yahoo, msn and bbc....

how sucky CNN is..?
I.E - Thu, Jan 15, 2009 - 8:30pm (USA Central)
i just e-mailed CNN that they were a joke! They are major Drama and they do nothing but encoradge the weak and the useless.
Just Me - Tue, Mar 17, 2009 - 4:45pm (USA Central)
CNN is fake.

It's a tabloid.

I am surprised that the CNN has no mention of the welcome Bush receved at Calgary,Canada. This was his first "speech" and there was shoe-throwing etc.

http://www.reuters.com/article/topNews/idUSTRE52G6PP20090317

Peace!
Just Me
Pete Tong - Mon, May 25, 2009 - 1:02pm (USA Central)
CNN will frame news items as "breaking news" for items that have been in the news cycle for a good 3-5 days. It was especially bad during the election. And is something breaking news if it is scheduled? For example, the Presidential Inauguration? CNN would say so. I agree Jamahl, CNN is shit.
TheLordJesusChrist - Mon, Sep 21, 2009 - 12:00am (USA Central)
CNN? A joke? I think the joke's on you.
Damian Black - Mon, Mar 1, 2010 - 12:30am (USA Central)
All the news stations are doing exactly the same with all this Tiger Woods crap.

Sadly, they seem to think the general public want up-to-the-minute updates on the latest celebrity scandals for FOUR DAMN MONTHS after said scandal has taken place.

Newsflash, most people want to hear about the healthcare bill, job creation, the Middle East quagmire, and the latest school shooting. Not how big the fake tits were on Tiger's latest mistress.

So-called "news" stations are all stupid. :(
Dan - Fri, Mar 4, 2011 - 5:12pm (USA Central)
I feel the same, CNN is becoming like Fox.
For a year now I stopped watching CNN or any of our other news channel. I watch Al jazzera English in youtube's life stream. www.youtube.com/user/AlJazeeraEnglish
I found it quite well balanced although they are based outside the US I believe they do a better job than the US media of today. CNN was our last hope but it seems to be following the others.
ChristaelDaphie - Mon, Oct 10, 2011 - 10:12am (USA Central)
HUH.........
eric - Thu, Jan 23, 2014 - 12:19pm (USA Central)
Hey,Ted if you guy's reported the news as it happends not how you see it with those liberal eye's you just might have more than 90,000 viewers. your not even a stupid man, when you lay with DOGS ie white house AMERICA can't afford your lies.one day very soon cnn will most likely be a defendant with the o'bama admin & CNN will be guilty as charged for all the bullshit you guy's air ARE YOU SURE YOUR AMERICAN

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